Killer Volts

Lee Herridge added a new photo to Peter Kapitola's timeline.

Peter Kapitola Nice! Except the right path in the bottom picture totally gives you a way to escape death.

Boyd Zurg Resistance is futile.

Kezza Kay Ohm My God.

Peter Kapitola I'm sensing a dark undercurrent to this post.

Kezza Kay I'm circuit all will be fine if we just conduct ourselves in a way that lives up to our high potential.

Peter Kapitola Some may ask wire we doing this.

Boyd Zurg I refuse to listen to those people

Peter Kapitola Good idea - they're so negative.

Morris Evans Yeah let's switch the subject.

Lee Herridge I'd have to say I don't glow why we're doing this. Maybe we feel powerless in the face of all these puns.

Morris Evans Someone needs to lock all of those killers up... in kilovolts.

Motelling what could happen

Peter Kapitola is at Comfort Inn and Suites Collie.

Kerryn Kapitola Are you inn comfort and feeling suite?

Peter Kapitola I feel like lodging a complaint about the quality of that pun. But I guess I can accommodate it.

Achilles, Heal Thyself

Peter Kapitola Never apollogize for making mythology puns.

Peter Kapitola I have nothing to be Thor-ry about.

Ben Chin Loki here, another pun.

Nick Whiley Oh look, everybody wants to be a Hera!

Tracey Herridge You guys, need to come up with new puns - Athenam all before...

Tiang Cheng Odin realise this.

Peter Kapitola Hey!-deez puns aren't that bad. Or perhaps we should have centaur puns to Tracey for checking first?

Tiang Cheng Speaking of, anyone else wanna visit Uranus one day?

Peter Kapitola Juno what Tiang? I think I'll pass.

Brandy Chap What the Valhall are you talking about this time?

Peter Kapitola Distance taurus apart but puns are bringing us back together.

Brandy Chap In the words of the great TSwizzle... we... are never, ever, ever getting back to-gaia.

Derek Guth Oh, limp us!

Gordon Cheng But if you do, you’re in danger of catching Hermes

Rob Hamm I try to keep my puns Loki, but I'm having a Hera-v a time with it.

Nick Whiley Hey! Dees are quite clever. Looks like you took a lot of Char-on thinking them up!

Nick Whiley Although that is really Poseidon the point, isn’t it?

Nick Whiley Some of these puns suggest the authors were drunk. Others were undoubtedly cerber-Is that enough for now?

Peter Kapitola If these puns are falling flat, perhaps someone Saturn them? Nevermind, I'll see if my friend Gemini can think of some more together.

Shawn Klimek Juno, I’m as Fauna puns as any Otter Nut, so Hera was Set to think up puns Hephaestus I could, but Dryad I might, it’s Artemis that the best ones were already taken. Hesperides are Helle good. (Io an apology since Minos so Lamia).

Peter Kapitola Atlas, we have a good string of puns!

Quick Unpickard

Larry Travis I'd call that a new low.

Peter Kapitola Yar.

Peter Kapitola Don't worry Larry, it's just a phase...er, no it's not.

Larry Travis I'm glad you haven't felt defensive and put your shields up.

Peter Kapitola But surely you can join me on this punning Enterprise?

Shawn Klimek Sorry, not this generation.

Peter Kapitola But I just know you vulcan!

Shawn Klimek That’s your human side talking.

Larry Travis You really thought we'd be in stitches laughing at this?

Peter Kapitola That's the hope to which I was Klingon.

Larry Travis Sorry I had to pick that hope like a bird of prey!

Adam Philp It sew sees what you did there.

Peter Kapitola That makes it all Worf it.

Kwal-a-tea Puns

Peter Kapitola I feel like anyone old enough to purchase a coffee mug should have a handle on all this by now.

Peter Kapitola Hmmmm, I always contain liquid and I don't always stay upright. Should I be concerned?

Chris Roberts Following instructions has never been your cup of tea.

Peter Kapitola I embrace non-conformitea.

Adam Brown Stuff this up and you'll look like a right mug.

Peter Kapitola And your confidence will start flagon.

Chris Roberts Surely we can saucer cuple of other's comments on this? Daniel, Britt? Boyd? Kerryn?

Boyd Zurg Looks like a load of crock to me.

Peter Kapitola "Crock"...er...easy there with such talk Boyd, it upsets my friend Celine. Won't anybody think of poor Celine?

Peter Kapitola If you don't follow these instructions you'll end up looking a Royal Doulton social media.

Chris Roberts Look, we're going to get in plenty of hot water if we chai to please everyone. Mi local bar is ta place I learned that. *Cough easily offended cough*.

Mail-ificent

No, not like that...

Peter Kapitola If your letterbox doesn't have any numbers on it, you really need to address that.

Kate Wilson Bills are male. And fee mail.

Peter Kapitola If only they were free mail.

Kate Wilson If free mail were an option I'd be going for it post haste!

Peter Kapitola You would master that post!

Kate Wilson We should stamp this pun fest out before it's too late....

Kate Wilson How do letters get married?... They envelope.

Kate Wilson Guess I can slot a few in before bed.

Peter Kapitola You deliver them well.

Kate Wilson Really? Sometimes I feel like when it comes to puns I've left the fold.

Kate Wilson But this is going well so that's a good sign.

Kate Wilson When you receive a letter you're like an ocean hunter... tearing apart a seal :/

Kate Wilson It would be cool to work for the postal service... I wonder if they paper hour?

Kate Wilson Danny Green and my postman have something in common... they're male boxers!

Kate Wilson What do you say when it's time to open an envelope?... Letter rip!

Kate Wilson I didn't get a reply and therefore I resent it.

Writ Large

I had no idea this giant pencil was near where I work. #PokemonGo #discovery

Morris Evans 2B or not 2B?

Morris Evans (Thought I should take the lead in the puns this time)

Peter Kapitola Those are some pretty sketchy puns.

Morris Evans I don't want to (gra)phite about it

Peter Kapitola I wonder if we can draw others into this.

Mike Hughes I really wish you would just erase this post

...

Peter Kapitola No comments for 7 hours... I guess this post is stationery.

Peter Kapitola Wow this really developed from a little stub into something great. I guess we all like to sharpener wits in this manner.

Paul Steven Phillips It could have two erasers, but what would be the point.

Norway is this true.

Why do Swedish warships have bar codes on the sides? So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.

Tracey Herridge are you Finnish with these terrible puns?

Lee Herridge I Dane not think he has.

Peter Kapitola Come on, they are admirable.

Lee Herridge Better than staring into your naval.

Dennis van Hout I feel ashamed for actually laughing at this abysmal pun..

Jason Bagwell I am firing everyone in here. Go home.

Peter Kapitola Aww... but think of poor Tracey... You'll destroyer.

Rob Bert I'm in Norway next month so I'll check for you!

Larry Travis I'm not sure I agree with your POSition on this.

Charon is carin'.

Jessie Kapitola Did you hear my groan from here?

Kerryn Kapitola JuPeter, are a pun lover.

Boyd Zurg Ju,Peter Saturn Uranus all day making puns, didn't you?

Keren Richards How does NASA organise a party? They plan et.

Peter Kapitola Mars tyu be so crude Boyd?

Australian Poly-ticks.

Peter Kapitola Bill may be Shorten answers, but most politicians are sKeating on thin ice and have no idea what they're talking Abbott. Those misCreants just love Swanning about Hawkeing their Ruddy policies, managing to Turn bull dust into believable promises, without a care for Howard dear citizens will suffer.

Lee Herridge What is with these Menzied attacks on the credibility of politicians?

Peter Kapitola I'm at my Whitlam's end.

Richard Kohlhagen I Pyne for some sensible policies. We should put a Holt to all this rubbish.

Boyd Zurg This may be true, Barton their defence the media often incorrectly reFrasers their statements.

Lee Herridge No Lyons - Reiding these puns is hard work

Peter Kapitola Though some consider these a Blight on the English language and want to Garrett me, I reckon these puns are too good to Latham to rest just yet.

Karoline All these budget broken promises put me on a Downer!

Peter Kapitola Many of us don't like the burden of responsibility so are happy to Palmer off to politicians, which is part of the reason for their Hanson salaries.

Turning the Vege-tables.

George Takei It's like he doesn't carrot all.

Kate Wilson OMG let the vegetable puns begin! Peter Kapitola get us started peas!

Kerry Egan He looks so swede. Turnip the dance music!

Kate Wilson Yeah, pumpkin out the beets!

Peter Kapitola Will I join in this pun-fest? Not nececelery.

Sara King Lettuce begin!

Tony Richmond Cool carrot but think it's missing the beet.

Peter Kapitola Yeah, he's a little bit rad. Not totally rad though. Rad-ish.

Peter Blankendaal I'd prefer four swedes to a carrot - I'm a big ABBA fan

Colleen Dixon That's not a pun, Peter. Somebody artichoke ya for that one.

Peter Blankendaal You're right Colleen, it is only a little pun; I believe it's a punnette.

Peter Kapitola Colleen, I think Peter was only pulling your legume ight want to be nicer to him in the future :)

Kate Wilson These puns are salad gold!

Peter Blankendaal I bean corny too long it is time to squash the fruits of my labours and turnip a new leaf.

Sub-standard Humour

They might be onto something here...

Daniel Braithwaite Getting that sinking feeling?

Daniel Braithwaite That headline is a real dive. One can't fathom...

Peter Kapitola This sort of humour is way out of our league (by about 20,000 or so).

Off The Rails

Peter Kapitola Do you think this is acceptable conduct or not?

Matthew Littlefield I'm not sure I'm following your train of thought. Maybe you can line out your points, so I can get on board with the way your thinking is tracking. Failing that maybe we will just be crossing lines.

Peter Kapitola Are you wheely interested? Or do you just want to know so you can ticket off your list?

Tiang Cheng i understand why she would want to brake off this relationship. He sounds coal-hearted.

Peter Kapitola Maybe he's just trying to gauge whether their relationship is going anywhere. Or maybe he just has loco motives.

Christian Pete

Not Great. Perhaps they need to pray and ask God to help them let off steam.

Jeffrey J Reeder Seems like she's trying to railroad him into breaking up. Bet she kicks his caboose right out the door!

Matthew Littlefield It really would be unfair for her to rail at him.

Electrical Pun Storm, Part 2

Morris Evans ΩMG

Michael Fiero I'm fraid the wire cant resist anything.

Peter Kapitola Wire you being like that?

Boyd Zurg but you need to refuse

Peter Kapitola Why? Is it against the code of conductor something?

Trevor Spangler You conducting an experiment here, Peter?

Morris Evans This always had the potential to induce the current surge of comments.

Daniel Braithwaite I'm going to elect Ron and then he will put a stop to these puns.

Daniel Braithwaite In the meantime well just solder on until we can get the situation rectified.

Peter Kapitola These puns are revolting.

Peter Kapitola They transformer person into something with no potential.

Peter Kapitola Maybe I'm just feeling a bit flat and need a recharge.

Boyd Zurg I diode to this punfest a long time ago

Boyd Zurg How do I impede the notifications?  :'(

Peter Kapitola Boyd you are showing your reluctance.

Boyd Zurg In admittance, there is still a compulsion to respond :-/

Punicycle

What's the difference between well dressed man on a unicycle and a hobo on a bicycle?
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Attire

Leith Rankine Attire

Leith Rankine I GOT IT

Brandy Chap Attire

Peter Kapitola Well done guyth. I think we can call this one clothed.

Kate Wilson Please don't threaden us with any more of these jokes.

Peter Kapitola Can I tailor them to suit you better Kate?

Boyd Zurg Yeah don't 'tread'en us Pete

Boyd Zurg And yeah, I like my clothes bespoke

Peter Kapitola These are mostly off the cuff. But I think they work better if you chain a few together without taking a brake.

Boyd Zurg As long as you don't recycle them

Kate Wilson These jokes are shirthouse

Kate Wilson Just sleeve me alone

Peter Kapitola I can't now Kate. I'm too invested.

Ter Ry This thread seems to have been derail(er)ed. Best to lever it alone.

Those are some Swede puns you might say.

I took a drill to some Expedit today... note the non-standard shelves.

Chris Roberts Nice work. Myshelf, I have no ikea how you were able to get it done so expeditiously.

Kerryn Kapitola Gee Chris, at least share some puns.

Tiang Cheng I'm storing those ideas for later

Peter Kapitola Chris is just being shelfish.

Chris Roberts I was just hoping that if I raised the bar, you'd put it together yourself that I've furnished you with an opportunity to really drill into this topic. If you tried, I'm sure it would work.

Kerryn Kapitola Allen keyp trying to do is make it work.

Adoorable Puns

I thought that my cupboard door would open easily, but there was a catch.

Erik Olsen Did your life hinge on if it would open?

Erik Olsen So could you handle the cupboard door opening.

Peter Kapitola Yes Erik I was a bit obsessed with it. I tend to latch onto ideas pretty strongly.

Erik Olsen I guess if all else fails you could just shelve it.

Peter Kapitola Yes but then I would just bolt straight to the next idea.

Richard Kohlhagen Don't drawer it out Peter, just get it fixed.

Pasta... Stat!

Chris Roberts I have to admit, I cook a mean spicy pasta. As long as by 'mean' you mean 'average'.

Peter Kapitola I think you're just experiencing impasta syndrome.

Tom Marshall Really using your noodle there

Daniel Braithwaite That's a pasta distribution I'm not looking forward to

Rick Davey Pass da pasta Pastor. Faster Pastor.

Anny Britt Mmmm spicy. Sounds like a pretty standard deviation from a traditional recipe.

Peter Kapitola Just remember, it should be al dente, not a la mode.

Framed

Peter Kapitola

Such a happily abusive picture frame. I'd be mad but he's so happy about it.



Daniel Braithwaite Glad you're not getting hung up about it

Peter Kapitola It's all about how you frame it Daniel.

Daniel Braithwaite It's important to stay fixed on the positive

Peter Kapitola Yeah I'm not taking it too hard - ware would I be if I did that?

Daniel Braithwaite Yes, it's important to view the bigger picture.

Peter Kapitola Yeah otherwise I'd be screwed.

Ter Ry Are you saying that it's knot important?

Peter Kapitola Frayed knot.

Boyd Zurg He looks rather high strung.

Tracey Herridge Maybe he was ti(r)ed and strung out after a long day, dealing with people who would knot listen and wanted to nail him for stuff he didn't do.

Ter Ry Seems to me he hasn't kept a level head either, who knows how this situation will unwind.

Morris Evans I think when your back's against the wall, it's natural to become a little tongue tied, but perhaps this guy is still smiling as he knows he can share the load?

Urine Trouble

Peter Kapitola When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

Richard Kohlhagen Piss weak joke :)

Peter Kapitola You rolly gee ... what a burn.

Richard Kohlhagen Sorry, couldn't hold it in :)

Kerryn Kapitola That's my No. 1 favourite joke.

Richard Kohlhagen Careful, all this toilet humour can cause infectious laughter. You'll wet yourself.